Question Bank

Friends and Family

1. How long would you want to know your partner before introducing him/her to your family?

  • Only a few days
  • A week or so
  • A month
  • Several months

2. Is friendship or a romance more important to you?

  • Friendship. Romance can come and go but friends can last a lifetime.
  • They are equally important and should both be present in life.
  • Romance. Having someone to love and love you is very crucial to a happy life.
  • A good, romantic relationship should also be a friendship.

3. How often do you communicate with your close family members and friends?

  • I communicate with at least one of them every day.
  • I communicate with them 2-3 times a week.
  • I communicate with them 2-3 times a month.
  • I only talk to them when they call me.

4. Which statement do you agree with most?

  • Your partner should learn to love your parents and siblings.
  • Your partner should show respect and hospitality to your parents and siblings.
  • It shouldn't matter what your partner feels toward your parents and siblings.
  • It doesn't matter how your partner treats your parents and siblings.

5. Do you want to have kids?

  • Absolutely! I want to find someone to start a family with.
  • Eventually, if it feels right and my partner and I have a stable relationship.
  • Maybe. Starting a family is a lot of responsibility.
  • No, I do not want to have kids.

6. When raising an infant,

  • A woman should be the primary caretaker of the baby.
  • A man should be familiar with some caretaker's duties.
  • A man should be comfortable with most caretaker's duties.
  • A man should be comfortable and willing to perform all caretaker's duties except breastfeeding.

7. Would you consider being with someone who has chidren from past relationships?

  • Yes, we'll make it work if we are right for each other.
  • Yes, but only if the children do not live with my prospective partner.
  • No, I'd prefer to be with someone who doesn't have much prior baggage.

8. If your partner has a child who is resistant to the idea of your relationship, what strategy will you most likely choose?

  • Avoid confrontations with the child and wait till s/he feels right about your relationship.
  • Actively engage the child in family activities, assign responsibilities and try to become a parent figure.
  • Encourage the child's independence by allowing him/her to do whatever and try to become a friend.
  • Buy lots of presents for the child to win him/her over.

9. If your partner wanted to regularly spend some time with her/his old friends, how often would be OK with you?

  • Once a week
  • Once a month
  • Twice a year
  • Once every five years

10. Would you involve your friends or extended family members in helping you to make decisions for your family?

  • Never
  • I always ask their advice and sometimes act on it.
  • I sometimes ask their advice but the final decision will be mine and my partner's.

11. Would you be comfortable if your partner's best friend was a member of the opposite sex?

  • That would be perfectly fine; they are just friends.
  • It would make me slightly concerned, but I would trust my partner.
  • I would be suspicious if they spent too much time together and would not encourage it.
  • I would be very uncomfortable and would ask my partner not to hang out with him/her.

12. Your partner doesn't like it when you invite your friends over. What would you do?

  • Stop inviting my friends.
  • Negotiate who and how often I could invite without upsetting my partner.
  • Meet with my friends somewhere else.
  • Continue to do it despite my partner's wishes.

13. If your partner wanted you to end a relationship with a close friend, what would be your reaction?

  • I would consider his/her reasoning and if it made sense, take action to end the friendship.
  • I would argue against it. Unless there is a good reason to stop being friends, I wouldn't end the friendship.
  • I would ask my partner and friend to talk to each other and work out the issues between them.
  • I would ignore their request. Nobody can tell me who I should and shouldn't be friends with.

14. If you had to choose between your best friend and your new partner, who would you choose?

  • Always my friend
  • Always my partner
  • My partner, only if I am madly in love with her/him.

15. How would you feel if your partner made plans with friends or family involving you without talking to you first?

  • I'd feel angry/frustrated.
  • I'd feel disappointed but I'd try to understand.
  • I'd feel OK if this didn't interrupt my plans or my routine.

16. If you did not like your partner's family members, would you still visit with them once in a while?

  • Most likely not.
  • I would only visit them on rare occasions.
  • I would still visit them as often as my partner wants us to.